Tag: Daily

Tonight’s the night

Rorschach would say you have a hard time relating to others. I like seafood. I’m really more an apartment person. I’m generally confused most of the time. I’m Dexter, and I’m not sure what I am. I’m going to tell you something that I’ve never told anyone before. Under normal circumstances, I’d take that as… Continue reading Tonight’s the night

With a warning label

Son, as your lawyer, I declare y’all are in a 12-piece bucket o’ trouble. But I done struck you a deal: Five hours of community service cleanin’ up that ol’ mess you caused. You’re going to do his laundry? Say what? No! I want to live! There are still too many things I don’t own!… Continue reading With a warning label

Michelle, I don’t regret

Michelle, I don’t regret this, but I both rue and lament it. All I want is to be a monkey of moderate intelligence who wears a suit… that’s why I’m transferring to business school! This opera’s as lousy as it is brilliant! Your lyrics lack subtlety. You can’t just have your characters announce how they… Continue reading Michelle, I don’t regret

I feel like a jigsaw

I’m really more an apartment person. Finding a needle in a haystack isn’t hard when every straw is computerized. You all right, Dexter? I will not kill my sister. I will not kill my sister. I will not kill my sister. I feel like a jigsaw puzzle missing a piece. And I’m not even sure… Continue reading I feel like a jigsaw

Doomsday Devices

There’s one way and only one way to determine if an animal is intelligent. Dissect its brain! Stop it, stop it. It’s fine. I will ‘destroy’ you! Why yes! Thanks for noticing. No, just a regular mistake. These old Doomsday Devices are dangerously unstable. I’ll rest easier not knowing where they are. I’ve been there.… Continue reading Doomsday Devices